Portrait of Ozark Cancer

Look at this photo and what do you see?

On the left is an orphan at 17 in the middle is his grandmother 70's, retired RN and on the right her son aged 53.

Both of this young mans parents died of cancer in their 30's mom from breast the dad- not sure. The son on the right died of liver cancer Tuesday Aug 28th 2018. The grandmother in the middle took care of all three victims of cancer herself.

Recently Hospice was used for her son (53) along with multiple sign ups for various cancer drug trials. He was not a candidate for any cancer trials- because his is a male. Most cancer trials are looking for females only.

Hospice provided a hospice nurse, morphine pills and equipment needs for the son's comfort to die at home. He wanted to die at home in his single mothers care. His mom in her late 70's, bathed him, changed him, fed him, clothed him, cleaned his bedding 2x's a day, moved him, dealt with insurance and doctor visits, drove him to appointments, ran the horse farm, went to her own physical therapy 40 min away three times a week and she slept about maybe 3 hours a day. 

The hospice nurse failed to notice he was not getting enough fluids. The hospice nurse is also a farmer and her daughter is getting married and her mind was a bit distracted at the last visit of the evenings. Dry mouth and throat means you can't swallow pills. A sponge on a stick is what you give fluids with. We gave him watermelon juice, grape juice and water anything he wanted on a sponge stick. Liquid morphine was provided. He was on an oxygen machine for the last stages. The cancer ate him from the inside. His fat, muscle, brain, ligaments were all gone in short order. He was dry skin and bones but no bed sores, no diaper rash, and no odor. He was very taken care of by his mother. Hospice at least in our area does not have any IV fluids. They do not have any bags nor needles. They have a hands off policy about this part of end care. There are many reasons why they don't but you can google that. In the end the cancer eats the person and takes all it can. The body can't live without food and water and the cancer wins. Hospice at least provides a pain free death. It takes about three days to die after they start to go. On the last day he asked me for french fries. I got in my truck and found hot french fries locally made in our small town. He ate two fries and gave me a thumbs up. The next morning at 1 a.m. I got the call from his mom, he died. He was washed, dressed and tied up in a clean sheet by his mom. She called our local funeral home to come and pick him up when they can. Her house is a log cabin with no air conditioning. He is to be cremated and his ashes spread over the farm. Just like his other brother, her 2nd son, the father of the young man in the photo was 9 years ago. Her sons have never got to live past 54. He did smoke, was a truck driver and drank a lot of coffee and ate truck stop fare. Holistic herbs were attempted but he refused to give up smoking and he refused to change his diet. His mother is angry to have to have a lost both of her sons to cancer. She gave birth to them and then watched them die as adults. But she sucked it up pulled up her panties and got it done. She adopted her grandson and raised him, works as a nurse on weekends, still raises horses and life goes on. She told me when it is her time to go this is how she wants to die in her cabin and in my care. I am to spread her ashes over her Ozark farm.

no cagas donde comes

Do not shit where you eat  is my rant for the day.
I have learned living in the city and now on a farm what it means to take care of our earth. Monsanto is a team player an agent of destruction of our soil and our bodies. Roundup causes cancer, end of story. I am happy the courts flushed out all the hidden lies and false science they tried to bury. But the real problem is that Monsanto funds the Agricultural colleges and indoctrinates the next generation of gullible farmers that science knows better than nature/God.

I will take weeds and bugs over having cancer any day. Nature was built to feed people and the other creatures. Trying to make science that feeds more and poisons the ground is just stupid. And now children have cancer, animals have cancer and the sea, air and ground are polluted for the next generation. At some point we need to let that sink in that we have poisoned the earth. It goes down from here if we do not stop. Nature can restore itself with time. But not if we keep draining resources in the name of science and feeding the greed of others. So do something today. Do not buy that weed killer and share the wisdom about taking the time to pull a weed instead of spraying it. Lets all spread a little less cancer on the planet we all live on.

Holstered pt.2

Here is the holster I made for a friend for his birthday. He will not live to be 54 thanks to liver cancer. But he asked for a soft holster for his revolver for protection. Living out in the rural Ozarks some crime has happened to these people. 

I used hair on suede cow leather for the holster and a soft leather belt for the shoulder strap.

A single copper rivet and 2 adjustable Chicago screws for the belt.

It is simple and soft and wanted.

Truck Seat Recover

My truck sea finally got too threadbare. We decided I could make my own seat cover using newly bought leather and wool. Having never done this I mad a pattern and a muslin practice one.

But my husband thought I should just sew over the original seat cover.

It did not turn out well. The original seat was stretched out and the new one was ill fitted. Back to the sewing room and youtube.

I was able to find a great video for recovering a seat the right way at Buchminister Upholstery

and the video I used is here

I made a new pattern out of craft paper and car fabric I had on hand. I got this for free by clearing out unwanted fabric from a room from a person who sells fabric bulk.

The Velcro strips markings

A cold fit to see if I need to sew again. I sewed this using my regular sewing machine before I used the leather machine and nylon thread.

I put in grommets and used heavy duty elastics that are made for shoes. It fit very well.

My husband installed the newly covered seat.

Lots of sweating.

It was not a match and was never going to be. But this will save the seat and saved us money buying a $100 cover or new seat. It will outlast the seat and cushion.

My farm truck is back in action.

12 strings of beauty

I love to play strings, any kind of strings. I am not as accomplished as my friends but I still love to play.I get inspired by the Denver songs of the 70's. Whether 6 or 88 strings if it makes a nice sound I play it. I love the rich sound of sympathetic strings on the Hardanger or the 12 string guitar. I hope to own a Hardanger one day. But I can still play my 12 string, viola and the piano and enjoy their sound.

Broken Stroken

This is Poppy our mostly outdoor cat. He stays outside until fall and winter or it foster kittens are in the house. He is napping in the heat on our deck next to the okra basket. I should have heeded his warning about working outdoors this July. I got heat stroke two times this month. I had been taking care of friends, driving around, farm sitting three farms and tending my own garden in the middle of the day. I had stopped sweating and kept feeling like fainting/ dizzy as I walked around. I came inside and drank gallons of fluids. Then the headache started and nothing worked to quell the head pain. For 3 days my head hurt and I slept/napped a lot. My husband made me stay inside and kept me hydrated. This was the first time this has happened to me. I now understand how people can die from this. It is like a painful stroke/migraine that never stops and you never feel right either too cold or too hot while everyone else feels fine. So now I do my chores early or at dusk and drink a lot of tea and gator aid. 

Big Green Sweetness

Update: we cut this up and it lived up to its sweetness. Every part of the vine, stem and spoons were dried up before we picked it.And it had a yellow belly (or end for us) from sitting on the ground.

This year I grew watermelons from seeds I saved from a very sweet melon we ate last year. I could not remember what the melon looked like but that it was sweet. I started them in my greenhouse in May and them planted them on a pile of dry horse manure we dumped on a meadow. I had 6 melons come up and ripen this month. They are about 16 pounds, ready for harvest. I talked to many farmers about when to pick and have nailed it. Yellow bottom, deep hollow thump, shriveled vine/spoons. And my dogs kept the groundhogs, coons and deer off my melons. And I have success with these planted next to my pumpkin patch. 

Raggedy Repair

I was asked if I restore old dolls recently. I restore many things from machines, wood, cloth, bone  and leather. If it is broken I can fix most things, just not people. One thing about dolls is there is a lot of love in that object. Most want their doll back to the original but that does not happen in my price range and I refer them to a preservationist. But I can clean, sew and refurbish most things. I have sewn dolls and made clothes for many dolls. This Ann is the largest one I will work on. I had no idea there were so many kinds of Ann & Andy dolls in so many sizes. Most are well loved and it shows. The good news is that there are many out there for parts, parts still made and patterns available. I never owned an Ann, I had a large Snoopy doll I drug around and slept on. It is only a memory. But once in a while I get to work on someones woobie or toy companion. And I get to be Geppetto for a little while in my studio.

Holstered

These are examples of handmade holsters other people have made and sell on line. I have been looking for ideas as I have been asked to make 2 leather holsters. The friend who asked is dying of the late stages of liver cancer. I asked that he not accidentally shoot his hospice nurse when she changes his dressings. He told me he just does not want anyone to sneak up on him in his home. He used to be a truck driver and has always had a piece on him when working or staying somewhere. His mother is taking care of him at her home. My friend is only 52 years old and is no longer a candidate for any new cancer treatments nor trials. So to make him happy, I will make these for him. He turns 53 this week and he will not live to see 54. He is the second son to die under their roof in their family. I feel for my friends mother as she helps her son on his last days. The cancer eating away his flesh from the inside out. It is not pretty and does not smell nice. Luckily, he feels none of that as he is with hospice home care. They take care of their own here in the Ozarks. Many choose to die at home with their family like it used to be before nursing homes and hospitals. It seems better all the way around for the dying and their family/friends. 

Exit Stage Right

Well after posting flyers at all my local vet clinics I got three calls for our foster kittens. We offered them for free even though we spent the money for vaccinations and vet visit. We want healthy kittens instead of sickly ones.

Here is Frosty and the orange male kitten. Frosty was an only kitten found inside a wall that no one wanted last year, so we kept him. This was his first foster litter. He misses wrestling with them and eating their kitten chow.

This is our first Missouri cat Poppy. He was run over in a parking lot. We picked him up and brought him to a vet 8 years ago and we kept him after that. He wants no part of the foster kittens. He likes our dogs and cats Frosty and Melon and that is about it. He lives outside most if the summertime.

Kittens feasting for weight gain. I wormed, vaccinates and wormed them again after the de-ticking and flea removal. My husband cleaned out their ear mites while I restrained them. I bathed them three times to get all the fleas and ticks off before setting them loose.So happy I have the puppy tent for just this kind of emergency. With so many foster kittens and illness that comes into our home we have to stay on top of pest control and clean up.

This was the prettiest of the trio. She got adopted by a young girl who could not choose one.I picked this one for her.

All three have new lives now instead of becoming road carrion. After three weeks we were concerned about finding homes for them. One way to do that is the local farm auction. But that is very stressful for them and they most likely will not have a good ending. But it is done here with dogs and cats along with rabbits, goats, poultry. Put in a cage and sold. There is no shelter nearby and the closest ones are full/kill shelters. But I did not have to worry. These kittens got news homes to  grow up in.

All kittens and cats love our washable vintage sofa.

This is the best part of fostering sleepy happy safe kittens. 

The Three Stooges of Summer

Last week we were cattle farm sitting for a neighbor who was out of town. We were driving the dirt road to their farm at dusk when I saw something in the middle of the dusty road. It was a small orange kitten laying in the dirt. We stopped to see if it was still alive and I got out of the truck to check. The kitten looked at me and meowed, I saw no blood, no bones and it got up and climbed me meowing loudly. And then I heard more meows coming from the woods/pasture to my left. Out pops two more kittens from the tall grass. They all are meowing and climbing me like a tree. They are not feral, love humans and were very dehydrated. As it was getting dark and we still had to check cattle, back to our house we drove. Three hungry kittens climbing all over our diesel farm truck bouncing along the country roads. At home, I grabbed my kitten zip tent from the garage, put the wards in there and a bowl of water until we got back.

This is called a puppy tent and it is a lifesaver for me. You can unzip the top and bottom, easy to clean, drys in the sun, the animals can breath and stay cool but also stay caged as needed. The fabric is strong and the zippers well made. I have fostered 4 litters with this tent and it is great shape. I can fold it up after use. I got the 4ft in diameter and can place 6 kitten in here with litter and a bed. The fabric is easy in their paws, no metal clanging  cage rattle to traumatize me nor them. I can put this in any room of my house and the kitten mess stays inside the tent. The kittens can see out, are safe from the older cats and they seem calmer inside the tent. Worth getting this if you foster or raise baby animals.

That night I evaluated the three kittens. They were thin, covered in fleas and ticks. Into the tub with the blue Dawn for a bath. After tick picking, ear cleaning, bath and dusting of DE powder I put them to bed in the kitten tent. The white and tabby kitten has a swollen neck an infection from ear mites and needed antibiotics. Luckily, I had some in powder form to mix with H2O. She had a rough 3 days then the swelling went down and she could eat. I checked the kitten tent and saw more ticks dying inside the tent. I cleaned that out and bathed the kittens- again. Seed ticks, blue ticks, red ticks, lone star ticks - just about every single kind of tick out here was on them- hidden in their fur, anus, paws -everywhere. We put the collected ticks in an alcohol filled jar. Seed ticks are the hardest to get out. But the Dawn works best for cleaning infested kittens. 

I took the stooges to the vet to get their weight, shots and wormer. They are 9 weeks, weigh 2.5 lbs and had a heavy worm load. As I foster I have wormer on hand along with flea drops. Now I am looking for homes for these kittens. We have enough adult cats as it is in our own farm. Kittens are plentiful here in the Ozarks right now. This will be an issue. But we are getting these kittens fixed in 3 weeks and will figure out where to bring them after that.

Cancer be Thy Name

I have been very busy in the month of July. I have had one friend my age die after an aggressive three year battle with the big C. She had the genetic marker for it. Her two adult children have to find out if they also have that genetic marker. I had another musical friend who made it clear through her first round of chemo. I have a male friend who has liver cancer and is on hospice. He is also my age and he is dying. He has had to move in with his mother so she can take care of him. I have a horsewoman friend who has lung cancer thanks to her smoking habit. She is in the same hospital as another friend. She is dying as well. I guess June -July is the sign of Cancer. It is all around in its various forms. So many people under the age of 50 have it. So much death and dying.

My solace is that when they die they are suffering no longer. They get to go into another life. There pain is over. Sure the family hurts and still feels pain, that never goes away. But the death is a blessing. I do not have the answer for the cancer. I hope I do get an answer as to who is doing this to our fellow humans. I have my suspects. But that is not my mission. I am here to help those left behind as best I can. But when there are so many at the same time it is like stopping the ocean from moving- you just can't and you get swept up into it. 

They Could be Heroes...

My rant for the day is where have all the good priest gone? We have had 4 priest in less than 2 years come and go in our small church parish. They can't cook, clean a house, mow nor even do laundry. They can minister, preach and do church things but that is about it. I was even told that when they were in the seminary they did not have to cook nor clean it was all done for them.

As a child I had Jesuit priests who could build a house,drive, fix an engine, put in a 3 season garden, sew and coach/teach all in a single day. And they expected you to suck up get to school and then home for chores, sports, tutoring or whatever was expected of you. They could mend a broken bone, milk a cow, teach several languages and you had to get in line and follow their example. They were men of a high standard. I thought all priest where like the Jesuits. But then Vatican 2 set hold in America and we traveled through the country from church to church as a family. Gone was the Latin, lay people were servers on the altar and priest got fat and very lazy. I have yet to meet a priest that can measure up to what I had growing up.
The strong, fit, intelligent and diligent priest has been replaced by a priest who wants his television set up for him ASAP. He can't even do that for himself. I do not think the apostles would have asked for a TV to be set up for them. If you have time to watch TV you probably are not doing what needs to be done. And this rant is not just about priest but Catholic Bishops, Cardinals and all the men of cloth.

When did the global catholic seminary start doing everything for their baby priest in training? It is not fair to the priests and it is not fair to the churches they serve. How can you shepherd men when you do not even know what it means to be a man? Our priests used to be men we could look up to. They could have been heroes. End of rant.